Tips to Diffuse a Toddler’s Meltdown
As much as you love your toddler, parenting your young child can sometimes be frazzling and stressful! Factor in that you might be a stay-at-home parent – on call 24 hours a day – and some days might make you feel like a ticking time bomb! But take heart! Relief is only a few steps away.
Try these tips to diffuse your toddler’s tantrums, or at least help you cope more positively:
1. Breathe. This one is so simple! We do it automatically. Yet, in moments of stress, we tense up and almost seem to hold our breath. If you can catch yourself and notice the tension in your body, then you can remember to breathe out.
Inhale a long, powerful breath of air. Close your eyes and feel the oxygen rushing to every cell of your body, rejuvenating and filling you with positive energy.
Almost immediately, you’ll notice your muscles relaxing and your face softening. The emotional effects will be palpable, too. You may find that you can look upon the situation not with tired frustration, but with compassion.
Breathe with your little, helping them navigate their response, together will make the next steps more manageable. 😉
2. Let them be. If the environment is safe and you’re at home, sometimes it can be therapeutic for your little one if you just let them have their tantrum. Be calm, and let them cry it out. Eventually, they’ll realize that throwing their fit doesn’t have the effect they wanted, and they’ll usually stop relying on this tactic.
Have them go to their room when they are acting out will help them understand the space and their behavior. I will bring my daughter to her room and let her know that when she is ready to be a big girl and communicate correctly she can come out. Then I give her the time and space in her room to have her melt down. This allows them to make the choice and to think about their behavior.
3. It’s not personal. Remember, your toddler isn’t purposely doing anything to you. You are simply the observer of their actions as they try to figure out how they can get what they want. They are stretching their boundaries and exploring their world.
If we can remember we are observers and not the intended receivers, we can approach the situation more calmly, thus reducing or eliminating the stress.
4. Stay in the moment. So many times, frustration arises because our minds want the moment to go differently. Maybe you desperately need to vacuum the floor or get that last load of laundry done. Instead, go with the flow. Recognize that you can make time for the chores later and know that it is okay.
Your child will never be at this precious stage in their life ever again. What would you rather remember looking back on these early years? All the piles of clothes you folded or the treasured memories you made with your little one?
Nurture Yourself, Too
To best be there for your children, you have to be there for yourself as well. That means nurturing your body, mind, and spirit. When all three of these needs are met, it’s easier to handle stressful situations such as toddler meltdowns.
How can you nurture your own needs?
Eat a balanced diet of nutrient dense proteins, fruits, and vegetables. Drink Water!
Make time for yourself. Even during a child’s naptime you can nurture yourself. Avoid doing chores during this time. Instead, do something that rejuvenates you. For example, take a nap, read a book, watch a movie, meditate, journal, prayer or talk with a friend. Doing something that makes you feel like you (and not only a mommy) does wonders for your psyche!
Feelings of frustration are normal. Talking with a friend can help you sort out what you’re feeling and come up with ideas to see these emotions for what they are.
These are just a few ideas. Feel free to use them as a springboard to your own unique solutions. It never hurts to keep looking for ways we can be better parents to our next generation.
If you can incorporate some of these tips into your daily parenting life, in moments of toddler meltdowns, you can guide your little one with patience. Instead of reacting with negativity to the tantrum, you will be in a position to offer love and comfort. Negative only feeds more negative, and its not healthy for you or the development of your little one. A positive approach with lead to positive reactions and the peace we need to be a good parent. Sometimes it helps me to see my daughter tantrum to remember what I must look like to God in times of desperation.
Remember that being a parent is a gift, you got this!